Came up with this, riding the bus to work one day. Tell me what you think??
We are Empaths. Empaths are a breed of fairy that live amongst humans, We are born with magical abilities and each empath has their own unique, special ability. Our powers dont peak until we are 16, though...and some Empaths have no ability at all.
I am Sophie Valentine, and this is my story.
IDK it sounds original...
We are Empaths. Empaths are a breed of fairy that live amongst humans, We are born with magical abilities and each empath has their own unique, special ability. Our powers dont peak until we are 16, though...and some Empaths have no ability at all.
I am Sophie Valentine, and this is my story.
IDK it sounds original...
Quote
Dec 5 - Ernyanversary!
Been here for 2 years :)
The ORIGINAL Rydia
of Ernya ;)
- ♥♫
It does sound rather interesting... I have the image in my head while reading of a little imp-looking creature... (Not completely different from humans, just in general shorter with a quirky look about them)
Could go a million ways, however... Like just having magical abilities wouldn't be enough, is she going to have an adventure of finding her magical ability? Turn 16 and have no magical ability at all, but be determined to get one, maybe?
I don't know, sounds promising but definitely needs a lot of thought. ^^
Caught my interest right away. The idea sounds pretty interesting, but for some reason her name bothers me. The first name is good but the last just makes her sound like a harlequin love story character. You know what I mean? Like both her first and last name are a bit romantic and it sounds really lovey dovey like when you put them together. Maybe try something like Sophie Montgomery.
Searching for 1 Aquarius Kingdom! 7k?
Yay :) Glad you thought it was interesting. Yeah her name is a work in progress, it was something I came up with off the top of my head. Her name will most likely change, though ^^; yay, im gonna work on it today :)
Dec 5 - Ernyanversary!
Been here for 2 years :)
The ORIGINAL Rydia
of Ernya ;)
I definitely found that you had an interesting start that pulled me in. I actually was hoping for more. I am a bit of a supernatural, fantasy addict. So I say awesome!
Okay, I came up with more to that passage...its really rough, and the grammar is horrible. But, here it is:
It was a Thursday afternoon, a week before I turned sixteen. I remember it clearly, like it was yesterday. I thought it was bazaar at first, and then everything fell into place and started to make sense. That is when my grandmother told me, that in a weeks time my whole world would change and turn upside down.
That was not the case, however, my world remained the same. I learned of my life before this one, and how I was a decedent of the most powerful beings on Earth. No, we're nothing like a vampire or a werewolf, in fact, lets go a bit farther back, to the fairy tales you read as a kid.
We are Empaths.
And we are a breed of fairy that live among the humans on Earth. We are all born with magical abilities, unless you're a nobody. And, each Empath has their own unique, special ability. Those powers, however, don't show until you turn sixteen. That is known as the “coming of age”, becoming an adult in Empath years. Some of those Empaths have no abilities at all, the “nobodies”.
My grandmother was the Queen, before she lost her crown to her evil sister, who wants to make the Empaths her own army, and take over the human race completely.
I was told, that I was the only one who could stop her.
But, I am one of those nobodies, and without a power, I have no clue how I would even begin to defeat her.
I am Lucy O'Neill and this is my story.
It was a Thursday afternoon, a week before I turned sixteen. I remember it clearly, like it was yesterday. I thought it was bazaar at first, and then everything fell into place and started to make sense. That is when my grandmother told me, that in a weeks time my whole world would change and turn upside down.
That was not the case, however, my world remained the same. I learned of my life before this one, and how I was a decedent of the most powerful beings on Earth. No, we're nothing like a vampire or a werewolf, in fact, lets go a bit farther back, to the fairy tales you read as a kid.
We are Empaths.
And we are a breed of fairy that live among the humans on Earth. We are all born with magical abilities, unless you're a nobody. And, each Empath has their own unique, special ability. Those powers, however, don't show until you turn sixteen. That is known as the “coming of age”, becoming an adult in Empath years. Some of those Empaths have no abilities at all, the “nobodies”.
My grandmother was the Queen, before she lost her crown to her evil sister, who wants to make the Empaths her own army, and take over the human race completely.
I was told, that I was the only one who could stop her.
But, I am one of those nobodies, and without a power, I have no clue how I would even begin to defeat her.
I am Lucy O'Neill and this is my story.
Dec 5 - Ernyanversary!
Been here for 2 years :)
The ORIGINAL Rydia
of Ernya ;)
original post had to many uses of the word 'empath' and the word 'we' so t does kinda sound repetitive. use different terms to describe same things or situations.
^^; sorry didn't mean to sound cruel there, just my opinion...disregard at leisure
^^; sorry didn't mean to sound cruel there, just my opinion...disregard at leisure
While it does draw me in at first, can't help but get a 'Twilight' feel to it. I can't speak for anyone else, but if you can manage to keep the main character a heroine without a dire need for a male protagonist to keep things moving, I'd definitely read more.
*currently in silentgrace 7's possession. There were cookies. Good cookies. And a valentine.*
Took on last year pork pie..so scary. @.@
I think it's a good concept, but it all depends on the execution whether or not it will turn out well. Although I will say, I like the name- I've always loved Valentine as a name, even though it's horribly cheesy. It just has a great sound to it.